USA tour diary: Final episode

With the final training session completed at Ventura, the squad climbed the steps of the team coach bound for Los Angeles Airport for the 60-minute flight to San Jose.

Well, all except big Chico Flores. The Spaniard had packed his passport and wallet away in his suitcase which had left for San Jose, California, on a separate mini-van two hours earlier.

With no ID on him, he was advised that there was no way they would let him board the plane, despite the fact that it was only an internal flight.

So while the squad waved goodbye to Chico, and his fellow Spaniards wiped away the tears, Swans physio Richard Buchanan came to the rescue by driving him the five hours to San Jose in a hired car.

And with Chico yet to grasp the English language, Spanish-speaking assistant-manager Erik Larssen volunteered to make the road trip as well to keep him company.

Despite the delay, the coach made good progress along the beautiful coast road to Los Angeles Airport. So much so, there was time to travel through the affluent beachfront city of Malibu, before stopping off at Santa Monica Beach for an hour's sight-seeing.

While most of the players strolled along the pier, the staff took to the beach where the famous TV programme Bay Watch was filmed.

There was even time for goalkeeping coach Adrian Tucker and physio Kate Rees to pose for a quick picture in-front of the famous lifeguard station that is featured so heavily on the show. But Swansea's answer to The Hoff and Pamela Anderson they are not!

The Spanish contingent caused more chaos at the airport as another new signing, Michu, was turned away from the security check area after the name on his passport and boarding card didn’t match.

Thankfully Michu managed to sort it out and join the rest of the squad just as they started to board the Alaska Airlines flight.

Having arrived at the hotel, it was straight up for dinner where a huge round of applause went up when Chico walked in after his road trip.

As the big-man ignored the applause, the euphoria quickly died after a look that could kill. Funnily enough, it was never mentioned again.

Then it was off for the final game of the tour against San Jose Earthquakes where the teams lined up before kick-off for the Welsh National Anthem.

With a Dutchman, Canadian, three Spaniards and a couple of Englishmen joining Wales’ Ashley Williams and Ben Davies in the starting XI, there wasn’t a lot of singing going on.

The story was the same on the bench. “I tried to slip in a few Welsh words,’’ explained Spaniard Andrea Orlandi. “I got Cymru, Croeso, bore da, shw mae and nos da in there – and I’m still learning.’’

While the game of football, or soccer as they call it over here, may still be developing in the States, the referees are one step ahead of their British counterparts when it comes to technical innovations.

The referee in charge of the game carried around a small can of what looked like “silly party string” attached to his shorts. And he took great pride in spraying the contents on the ground to position the ball for a free kick or marking out the 10 yards for the wall.

Strange as it may seem, it actually worked, although I can’t see it catching on over here. Mike Riley take note.

As this is the last diary entry of the USA tour, we can’t finish without a special mention for kitman, and all-round good sport after the ribbing he’s had over the last 11 days, Michael Eames.

A regular in the diary throughout the tour with his classic quotes, the club is delighted to announce that it will be entering into discussions with Michael’s agent (his mum Suzan) to sign an exclusive deal for his own column in the matchday programme next season.

The club may have to sell a player to finance the deal, but it could be well worth it. He’s not revealing what the contents of the column will consist of just yet, but he may tell you about his refusal to buy an ice cream on the staff trip to the Rocky Mountains earlier on the tour.

“I’m not eating one. There are wild bears around here and they may smell the ice cream on my breath.’’

You’ve got to love him, haven’t you?

Have a nice day from the USA.

The End